If they're gonna make me write these things, they have to accept the consequences

[sharplittleteeth]

JULY STAFF NEWS - IT SERVICES

So. A month in to the role. Still not Dictator Of The World yet.

Have managed to hire a new minion, though.

I mean Server Administrator. Server Administrator. Can’t call them minions anymore. The union gets upset. He’s starting on August 11th.

This towering victory is somewhat offset by our programmer taking a month’s leave. She’s off to compete at an international roller derby tournament in Las Vegas, followed by travel in London, Berlin and Malaysia.

Note to HR: can I hire some flying monkeys to fill in?

Other progress in IT’s Plans To Rule The World: have created a new staff Intranet. Because it’s based in Lotus Notes, it will be easier for each department to maintain their own forms and documents. (Also, subliminal messages embedded into each page allow IT to create an army of hypnozombies.)

Right. I have to go do a budget reforecast.

No one told me Evil Overlords have to do budgets.

Comments

[ms-kismet.livejournal.com]

Love it!

Evil Overlords should be given minions to do budgetting for them so that EO's can sit back and plot... Or at least in my ideal world, that is how it would happen

[sharplittlteeth.livejournal.com]

As far as I can tell, the previous budget was created by rolling dice and multiplying that by the entrails of a goat. I'm afraid to touch it in case I accidentally cut something and unleash dread Cthulhu.

On the other hand, writing that staff news item was the second best thing that's happened to me this week at work.

(The first was actually hiring a new server admin.)

[ms-kismet.livejournal.com]

that sounds like the usual means of creating budgets to me... or at least in my experience anyway.

[kitling.livejournal.com]

Its a budget for a university - of course that was how it was created - its all random guess work anyway...

wait... what do you mean we can't afford dice...

In other news http://www.bayplay.com.au/
This is the place to to a resort dive in Melb :)

Evil Overlords also need to relax

[sharplittlteeth.livejournal.com]

Ah. Cool. A friend as telling me about these people. Thanks for the link.

[andricongirl.livejournal.com]

yay for minions

[anjellaroessler.livejournal.com]

I want minions too :-( Is there a Minion supermarket somewhere?

[sharplittlteeth.livejournal.com]

There are. They're called Temping Agencies.

Unfortunately, they're low grade minions, suitable only for cannon fodder and cleaning duties.

What I'm after is someone with the talent and ambition to work their way up to henchman status.